yeah, it is...time for holidays, family meals, making memories, staying indoors, reflecting on the current year and repositioning for the year ahead. At least that is how it is for me! Sitting here reading a few things (one to include TD Jakes' Relationship Bible), getting acquainted with my journal again, and thinking about where I am and how can I get to where I want to be from here is provoking many thoughts in me! No doubt my life is changing even while I feel stagnant (just sometimes) and battle the up and down feelings of the excitment of impending mommyhood, confusion for not being a 100% on what I want to do with the rest of my life, and alone because I don't really feel like the friends I have had, some since forever, and I have a whole lot in common anymore. Not to mention being pregnant and unwed has taken its toll on me here and there as well. I pictured the ring before the baby carriage but due to untimely decision making things got real and life had something else planned. So, my reality has become baby carriage no ring with complete contentment as I ponder about the horrible state of monogamy and the incline of divorce rates. I no longer know if I EVER want to marry forreal!! Oprah and Stedmond's lifestyle is looking like a go for me! No contract, no vows, no big to do, no lifetime expectations, and no lies about for better or worse, sickness and health, rich or for poor til death we part! I mean is anyone celebrating an anniversary?!?! I'm sure the anniversaries of marriages will become just as extinct as dinosaurs by 2030! Sad, a lover of Disney movies, namely Cinderella...I once became elated at the thought of marriage. Things do change...
So, it's time to take inventory because I'm ever changing as well!! What will my New Years post contain?!? Besides the blessing of a beautiful, healthy, happy baby girl...what do I want REALLY?!? Time to refocus the life plan!
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